It is possible for the sexual energy to be a rested, stable part of our lives. Over the last few months, I have been exploring this more sincerely. My experience has been that this topic is hard for so many of us because we have very inaccurate information about it. We have inaccurate information about the nature of the body, and there are also many ways the sexual energy is automatically moved into old subconscious pathways.
I hope that this article can elucidate some of the core themes and challenges.
First, perhaps as a general principle, we can say the following:
The whole body must be considered comprehensively. For example, an overly stimulated or disassociated mind may be the result of contraction/lack of space in or around the head, AND/OR it might be caused by a general lack of rest in the body. Considering both is important in healing.
Qualities of hate, incessant anger, hardness, as well as many of the predominating trauma responses (fight, flight, freeze) may be the result of contraction around the belly-softened heart. The heart is eventually integrated into the belly, activating a sense of abiding benevolence, compassion, tenderness, softness and love. Joy, wonder, magic and abundance are also accessed here.
Physical pain in the lower belly, pelvis, genitals, anus and legs may point to a split from the denser sexual energy. This is the primary topic we are exploring here. There can, of course, be pain in the higher regions of the body, which may be more readily healed through softness and space. The lower body will always require something deeper.
Space is the scope of Awareness opening up beyond a "someone" / "me." That space is then permeated with qualities or frequencies that flow or stream through the heart and belly. For example, I am often pointing my clients to the womb-like nature of that space: The warmth, the benevolence, the tender caress, the gentle love. This has most certainly resulted in profound healing. Trauma responses have been healed. Physical pain has been softened and relaxed.
Yet, for the deeper levels of pain, the sexual energy must be (I think) opened all the way down. A lot of chronic belly pain (labelled as IBS-related conditions or even allergic responses, for example) is simply the result of some core contraction happening around the sexual energy. The bodily energy is being bottled up within the lower belly. If such a bottling up continues for many years, it can result in the concretisation of energy centres leading to chronic/serious illnesses.
Cancer manifesting within the body, I am almost 100% sure, is the result of sexual energy not completely opening up. The rates of bowel and prostate cancer (in Men) are one example of the symptom of contracting around the sexual energy. We must explore this topic throughly and see that we have all the answers within us. I have tracked a large portion of this through my own body, having had chronic stomach pain for most of my life, and now (after many years) feeling the change.
Some core points:
We have to be sensitive enough to realise that we are not connected to our sexual energy. Engaging the sexual energy purely through the sexual act or masturbation, etc., IS NOT what I mean by "connected." Our sexual energy is the foundational wellspring of energy within the body. To be connected with that energy is to know it with constancy.
The first point will reveal that our sexual energy is trained to be CONDITIONAL. That is, it is moved in accordance with familiar subconscious pathways. In mainstream culture, we might hear people say: "I have sexual chemistry with [name]." Sexual chemistry is simply the result of having an established subconscious pathway that the sexual energy has learned to move through.
The sexual energy has magnetised or pulled us to people that match our subconscious structures, mirroring the relationship we had with our parents as children. Indeed, the sexual energy has POWERED those structures, and it will continue to do so until there is consciousness present. We develop such a dependence on these structures because they protect us from true, authentic pain! The conditioned movements of sexual energy are literally subconscious protection.
When those conditioned movements come to an end – i.e. we decide to break out of the dynamics, relationships, situations they keep moving us towards – we are met with the fact that the body is in immense pain! And, to the core point of this article, the pain is signalling that we are actually DISCONNECTED from our sexual energy. If we were truly connected to it, we would not be caught in personal pain; we would know our true source of wellbeing and relaxation!
Herein lies the real work of clearing the sexual energy pathways. It is all inclusive. Basically, we have to identify why we are not stably rested in our sexuality. I can locate two primary reasons:
We have a deep seed of hatred for the physical body itself; the animal, the instinctual, the primal. We carry shame and disgust about our bodily movements and fluids. We have become over-civilised and rejected the part of us that is deeply sensory. We run away from filth, dirt, shit. We are highly neurotic as a culture. We are afraid of getting down into the dirt. But our instinctual nature is rejoicing in the dirt. It is a deep relief to be connected to the soil.
We have trauma to do with the sexual energy. The sexual energy, in opening up, will put pressure on all our traumatised pockets of perception. The sexual energy will essentially POWER any of our existing subconscious pathways, and some of these places are deeply fragile and looped in trauma. I have seen places of great fear of being rejected and abandoned activate almost immediately after the energy is opened. The energy will essentially show us WHAT HAS NOT BEEN TOUCHED and turned over into TRUTH!
Some recommendations that are helping me:
EMBRACE THE SOIL! Embrace the sensory. Go a few days without showering. Enjoy your own smells, your own sweat, your own fluids. To our overly civilised neurosis, this might not make sense, but our animal nature does know the way. GET DOWN IN THE DIRT.
OPEN UP AS SPACIOUS WARMTH for the identities that activate when the sexual energy is moving! One aspect of Shiva is about deeply perceiving these identities, not fixating on the surface movements. This will help them to dissolve and let go.
HAVE AWARENESS that the sexual energy has been conditioned to FUEL your subconscious pathways. It will pull you into dynamics, situations, people that are not in alignment with your Being UNTIL its TRUE NATURE is revealed as your CORE WELLBEING.